Birthday Blessings

February 7, 2018 Journal Entry
"Emotions are a troubling thing sometimes. They can change with the wind and cause spirits to be low. I sensed a change in my emotions last night and awake this morning with a sense of foreboding"

The day before my birthday and MRI marked 2 years since my Papa Howard went home to be with the Lord. I thought of him much that day. How had 2 years passed so fast? Perhaps that is why I woke with a sense of foreboding, I don't know. 

I've heard people say they know when something is wrong, and have often wondered at the authenticity of that, until now. Jason met me at the imaging center, I felt I needed his confidence. The MRI test itself wasn't frightening, it's loud and cramped but not fearful for me. But something was amiss in my spirit and I needed Jason's strong presence with me. 
An hour and a half later I was through and relieved, yet still had the nagging feeling something was off. The technician indicated I would hear from my doctor before the weekend (this was a Thursday afternoon), and so I went home to celebrate with my little family my 39th birthday.

That night, Jason cooked a dinner of shrimp and grits and we enjoyed a quiet evening at home. One of those quiet nights you don't forget, and look back on often with fondness. I am forever grateful for my husband and his tender care for me.

Friday around lunch time I decided to all the doctor and see if my test results were in. You see, I had that "feeling" that something was wrong. The office had received the results and according to the nurse I didn't need to worry over the weekend. Her words were "the MRI didn't show any tumors or anything you need to ruin your weekend over." I hung up with an appointment to see the doctor the following Tuesday or Wednesday (I can't recall). 

I called Jason and other family members and everyone was relieved. But, something just didn't feel right about it with me. I decided to call back and cancel my follow up, I thought there was no point in going back to see the ENT if everything was normal. It was with my call back, my feelings were confirmed.

I asked the receptionist if I could cancel my follow up appointment if everything was normal, she immediately said "no" and asked to put me on hold; I knew then something wasn't right. The next voice I heard was the Doctor himself, and my stomach fell. He then explained that everything from an ENT perspective was normal but something called Arnold Chiari Malformation was found and noted by the radiologist. He asked me if I had a pen and paper and spelled the words so I could be sure to know what he was telling me. He then assured me he knew a great neurosurgeon in the area and would get to work immediately on the referral.

I then spent the weekend with Dr. Google and trying to get a grip on this thing called Arnold Chiari Malformation.

"According to my earnest expectation and my hope, that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life or by death." 
Philippians 1:20